Cassie getting her groove back
Cam, M-Chuck and Julius get ready for a cheat day breakfast, as Cam breaks his diet in the best way possible: with mom’s home cooking! Cassie seems to have overslept while they discuss the meal they’re about to crush. Cam suggests waking her up to get breakfast started right, but as they overheard, Cassie was already “rising and grinding”
Yes, the family was greeted by the sensual sounds of morning sex. Cassie’s new love interest Blair, in all of his Five Heartbeats splendor, seemed to be a hit in their first date. Needles to say, Cassie missed the breakfast. Julius went to drop M-Chuck off at Community Service (a.k.a. road clean-up) and Cam headed to practice. Cassie runs out the house to apologize for missing breakfast, and ask for Cam’s financial assistance with “a woman’s procedure” she needs to get done. You never want to see your mom in walk of shame attire the morning after her date!
“Good Cancer”
Cam immediately goes to M-Chuck’s community service location to tell her that Cassie has cancer. A slight overreaction to say the least. M-Chuck argues that the cancer has to be “the good kind” because of how she presented it to Cam (a hilarious back & forth). Since it’s a “lady procedure” Cam thinks M-Chuck should be the one to find out more details.
Vaginal Rejuvenation
While at the nail salon, Cassie and Missy speak about the joys of motherhood, and how she should have a baby with Reggie soon. Cassie thinks Missy will be perfect as a mother because she loves telling people what to do! M-Chuck gets to the salon to let Cassie know that Cam is scared to death that she has Cancer, due to the “lady procedure” conversation. Cassie then lets Missy and M-Chuck know that the procedure is for her to get her “pocketbook tweaked”. Having kids is awesome, but it wrecks havoc on a woman’s body, and Cassie wants to reconstruct her nether regions back to pre baby birth status.
Cam googles the definition of Vaginal Rejuvenation and is completely disgusted. He doesn’t know why Cassie would want to change her body in face of the side effects and to please Blair. He wants to call a family meeting to have an intervention for Cassie and M-Chuck and Julius reluctantly agree.
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Reject Your Coochie
Cam holds the intervention, complete with cue cards to list all the potential side effects of Cassie’s procedure including vaginal prolapse, which Julius humorously defines as “vaginas that start running laps”. Cassie is furious and let’s Cam know that it’s not about Blair, it’s about her. Cassie was a young mother who didn’t truly live her life as a woman, and wants that opportunity now. She gives Cam all the gory details about how it feels to have sex with her vagina in it’s current state. These kind of conversations with a mother may have sons in therapy for years, but when you broach the subject, be prepared for the subject matter!
Cam and Cassie understand one another, but agree to never bring up this topic again!
Reggie on quest to make money
Reggie has a discussion with Jimmy in the bathroom about brand building. Reggie gets frustrated with meeting people who sell him a dream. Jimmy puts Reggie in touch with his “money manager” Ira whom he guarantees will be an asset that Reggie will want to know.
Welcome to Mermaid Island
Ira meets Reggie and immediately lays into Jimmy with every Irish stereotype ever. He wants to have a conversation with Reggie over almonds as they play a game of Mermaid Island. Yes, seriously! Ira explains that he’s not a money manger he someone who will “try to find opportunities for my friends to enjoy their lives” He refers to himself as “the mucous of capitalism”, as money is an archaic concept to him. In order to see whether Reggie fully comprehends him and should be a business partner, Ira gives Reggie a copy of Jonathan Livingston Seagull to read.
He explains his difficulties with the book to Missy, who seductively explains that he’s thinking to hard. He should “stop trying to solve the puzzle” and just be him. Missy wants to take his mind of seagulls and money with a little rest and relaxation, horizontally. Reggie is more than receptive.
Seagull books, a new love interest for Cassie, and family discussions made for some of the funniest one liners yet from this season of Survivor’s Remorse. To see where Cam and the family go next, check back here in 6 days for another recap!
Jeff @JeffJSays is the host and creator behind “That ADHD Show“. Whether it’s behind the scenes or in front of the screen, Jeff strives to entertain, educate and interact with audiences of all sizes and demographics. Jeff has fun being him, as we all should!
