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Fat Joe

Source: @fatjoe / Instagram

Fat Joe has been blessed with a lengthy Hip-Hop career and he continues to evolve. Lately, he’s been asserting himself on social media and his recap of the history-making The LOX vs Dipset VERZUZ battle showcases Joe Crack’s Hip-Hop insight, personality, and comedic timing.

Now Fat Joe is quick to admit that he didn’t have a horse in the race because he is friends with everyone in both camps. But it’s too clear that the LOX, and particularly Jadakiss, took home victory on Monday night in MSG.

Over on his Instagram, for a special edition of The Fat Joe Show, the Bronx rapper jumped ahead of his usual Friday new show schedule to say he was “at the scene of the crime.”

Joe then proceeds to offer details on how got into the show, his choice in attire, the history of potential violence at Hip-Hop shows, a PSA on COVID-19 and, oh yeah, the battle itself in a little over 45 minutes. The tale is gripping, and here are just handful of quotables:

“Mind you I’m in Hermes…I’m thinking yachting.”

“That COVID was in there, somewhere, God bless. But that COVID was in there, GOD BLESS.”

“The element was in the air, the danger was lurking. Anyone who thought he was the toughest was there, with his crew.”

“I was neutral, but when the sh*t comes on that I’m on, I f*cking lose it…I almost pulled a Lil Mama, and ran up on the ring. I wanted the smoke at that point.”

“This was getting bad. Now remember, I walked in with the guy who made all the beats for Dipset, Rsonist. At this point, he look[ed]…like he wanted to cry.”

“But obviously, the LOX are Jedis, and they thought everything out.”

“The chicks look like they’d f*ck you up, it was real in there.”

“The sh*t was so real yesterday, so thugged out, so New Nork, do you know where I went to eat dinner after the battle? Take a guess? I went to White Castles [sic]. If you from New York, you know where I went.”

Editor’s Note: You know Joe is real because he mentioned ordering clam strips.

“Until you get kidnapped in Africa, don’t f*cking talk to me.”

Fat Joe also ended with a nod to Biz Markie, whose funeral he attended. Watch the full recap below.