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At long last, Mitt Romney has figured out why he isn’t president. Addressing his top donors via telephone Wednesday (Nov. 13), the Republican former governor blamed the defeat on the president being “very generous” to minorities and young voters.

Standing on the pillars of lowering student loan interest rates, student health care, and other enticing issues, Romney theorized that President Obama had the election effectively sewn up, before the votes actually came in. “The president’s campaign focused on giving targeted groups a big gift—so he made a big effort on small things. Those small things, by the way, add up to trillions of dollars.”

Romney went on to state that he’s “very sorry” that his bid for president was denied. “I know that you expected to win,” he told the donors. “We expected to win….It was very close, but close doesn’t count in this business.”

According to campaign finance chairman Spender Zwick, Romney raised a whopping $900 million to run for the nation’s top office, and plans to keep his supporters informed by releasing a monthly newsletter.

While Obama was named the election’s winner once he surpassed the needed 270 electoral votes, Romney grabbed “47 percent” of the popular vote.

Go figure.



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Photo: Policymic